back from the dead

going back here feels like I've been out of a time capsule. the last entry was 11 years ago? wow. life happens, lot of them. it's kinda strange to see the development of my way of thinking through my past writings. some feelings stay the same, some people don't. I can't imagine the absolute plot twist of my romantic life *sigh*. I do still love him, tho? I think? or not? but I know the wisest things to do is to let him go. but, a lot of dreams been achieved! yay. Not that much since I still feel stuck, and from my past entry turns out that was what I felt all the time. I haven't told you we are in one of the best institution this country ever had? and we got in? (we, as my self telling my past self). But the politics are not in the best time for the country. also the economic condition. but still, can you imagine that you've got geographical luck since your country didn't get bombed every hours of the day? izraeyl iz shit. uncle sam is shit. fight me.

The life has been dramatic, and exciting, and flat in certain times. still figuring out what I want to do in the bigger picture, like, pursuing my next academic life.. for several years I can't decide which major should I take, yet. Decision fatigue, or ANY DECISION MAKING IS ABOSOLUTE SHITTY THING TO DO FOR ME PERSONALLY. daym, how can I be a leader someday? or should I not?

I guess write do help me to maintain my scattered thoughts. I was once an aspire screen writer after all. shall I pursue that with the plot twist that I've got? *wink*.